Leadership is Feminine

WITH KRIS PLACHY

High-Performing, Business-Destroying Monsters

May 03, 2021

Has your shining team member turned into a shiny team member? The terms are pretty similar, but the motivation of each is quite different. The ugly truth is that they can’t be rehabilitated. So, let’s talk about what to do when those high-performing types become business-destroying monsters.

What you'll find in this episode:

  1. A shining team member is someone who is luminous and illuminates the entire team. When they shine, everybody else shines.
  2. A shiny team member is busy focusing on their own light. Their light doesn’t extend out to others. It actually does the opposite.
  3. A high-performing, business-destroying monster believes that they are untouchable. They are arrogant, demanding, entitled, privileged, noisy, and even in some cases, threatening.
  4. You feel that losing them in your business would be so catastrophic that you can't see past it.
  5. Here's how to handle those high-performing, business-destroying monsters.

Featured on the Show and Other Notes:

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Transcript: 

Kris Plachy: Hey, I'm Kris Plachy, host of the Lead Your Team podcast. Running a million dollar business is not easy, and whether you are just getting started with building your team or you've been at this for a while, I'm going to bring you honest, specific and clear practices you can use. Right now today to improve how well you lead your team.

Let's go ahead and get started.

Well, hello and welcome to the podcast today. How are you? I'm a little feisty is, uh, probably the truth. Maybe we would call it spicy. So this should be an interesting one. I, um, if you saw the title, maybe you're like, Hmm, this should be fun. Or you're like, dude, what's going on? So, yeah, high performing business destroying monsters.

How about that? How about that for a label? I wanna talk to you, this is on the heels of the podcast I did last week about the accountability quagmire. There's certainly something going on in my life, my personal life that I will talk a little bit more about that is influencing a lot of this, but it also just happens to coincide with.

A challenge that so many of my clients face, and that is, This cer, this quagmire, I guess to overuse that word of having a high performer on your team so somebody really can deliver the goods, right? Whatever it is. They're really good with your clients. They make you a lot of money. They know everything about your business, right?

Like they are the people that hold the keeper of the keys, whatever that is, whoever that is. There's a lot of you who have that person, um, in your team, in your company. And there's a problem with these high performers, and the problem that happens is when the high performer goes from being what I call a shining player.

So a shining player is someone to me who is luminous and. Illuminates the entire team. When they shine, everybody else shines. They, they share their light. They are good for team spirit, for culture. They lift everybody up. Their presence is good for the entire team. Right? And I know, you know what I'm talking about.

There's this energy they bring. They do know they're good, but they're not cocky, they're not arrogant. They're just good. And they want everybody else to shine too. So team members and, and employees who. Shine, brighten the team with their light. And then there are shiny team members, and these are people who are busy polishing their own shine.

They are. Busy focusing on their light and they do not brighten others. Their sh their light does not extend out to others. It actually does the opposite. They are so over focused on their shiny that it dims the light of others and. This is tricky as a leader because you have to be able to know the difference.

And sometimes someone who shines turns into someone who's shiny, and that's probably the most tragic of all, because maybe they were once such a great part of your business and now they're not. And here's how we know who they are. We know they are the shiny business destroying, high performing monster because they start to believe they are untouchable.

They are arrogant, demanding, entitled, privileged, they're noisy, and even in some cases threatening. If you do that, this is what I'm gonna do and how I know you're dealing with it as a client is because you come to me and you say, I feel paralyzed. I feel handcuffed by this person. I feel held hostage by this person.

You feel. Losing them in your business would be so catastrophic that you can't see past it. So then what you do, a lot of you is you try and accommodate this monster. And I know that people don't do this on purpose, so, but I know, I know that the interest is in saving the business. I do understand that, but I want you to write, let's just talk about if you're, if this is you and you're in it right now, I want you to see what's gonna happen because I have been at this for far too long, and I will tell you, we don't rehab high performing business destroying monsters because once they know, once they know they can threaten you or intimidate you, and it works, you're done.

And not only are you done with that person because then they'll just play that game with you. You also are done with the team because they see what you do. And you have to remember when you, when you sacrifice your morals, your ethics, your values, to keep someone on a team because you think without them, the team will suffer.

You'll lose money, whatever that one monster player may win. But the team is losing and you, it's like that. You know that old expression, right? When you point a finger at someone, you've got three pointing back at you, right? We've probably heard that before. And we tend to not focus on the three pointing back.

We just focus on the one that's pointing. And that's what I think about. When you're overly focused on keeping one person happy in your company, you are actually creating unhappiness in a lot more people. And it destroys the team. It destroys your culture, and eventually this person's gonna leave you anyway.

That's the irony. So what do you do? Here's my advice. Listen to me, let them go. The challenge, the discomfort, the poor perf the poor results that you might have in your business are temporary. If this person is the one who runs the blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, in your company, you know what? You'll figure it out.

If this is the person who makes all the sales in your company, you know what? You'll find another one. If this means you're gonna have to work an extra 10 or 12 hours a week in your business, you know what? You can do it and it's temporary. It isn't worth it for leaders. It isn't worth it. If you really wanna step into that mantle of leadership and you wanna own it, and you wanna be that person, you have to demonstrate this courage.

People want this leader, y'all. They don't wanna work for the leader who tries to make everyone happy. That is a lie. We wanna work for somebody who stands up for something. The leader who wants to make everyone happy ends up making no one happy, including themselves. So how do you do it? You let 'em go.

First of all, everything I teach you guys, if you're a podcast listener and you know all this, if you're in our program, this is what we work through also, right? Like, You have to set and clarify your expectations. You have to have clear values. You have to have clear job descriptions. We make them a re-offer.

We tell them what we expect of them, both from their behavior and their results, and we tell 'em what will happen if they don't deliver on either. And a monster high performer is not gonna change. So they will show you this behavior again very quickly, and then you let them go and then you pay them to leave.

This is my belief system, Pam. How much does it take to get them gone? It's worth it. It's worth it. Every single one of my clients who has hired me, and that's been our first order of business, is that nightmare, long term person who's been here forever. I don't know what I do without 'em, but I can't work with them anymore.

They know everything about my business. I feel really bad because I haven't paid attention to what they do, and I'm afraid if they leave, I won't know where anything is. And that person. Every single person who has hired me to help them with that person comes to the call after they're gone and says, I cannot believe how different it is around here without that person here, it's like a breath of fresh air.

It's like a weight has been lifted. It's like magic. Everybody's so much happier. I have never had a client tell me, oh, that was a huge mistake. I wish I hadn't done that. Is it hard? Yes. Does it take courage? Yes. But you know what? You work through this one. Everything else will be easy from then on. But until you learn this, you will be held hostage.

You will be prisoner to the demands of a monster. And I'm being dramatic on purpose because it feels that way. There really are people who do this, who use their privilege, their entitlement, their skill, their mastery, and they use it for abuse. And some of us get in the crosshairs of that, be the leader who won't put up with it model for everyone that that is not okay.

The more we do this as a collective, the less of them will exist. I know this to be true because I know what it's like to work. And be on a team where everyone shines and everyone lifts everybody up, and everyone is happy to be there, and no one is the super special, shiny object. Even though they may perform better than everyone else, they shine, which means they fill others up with their light instead of being a vampire and sucking the light out of everybody else.

So I hope this is helpful. I hope you feel validated and heard because you, I know who you are and I know this is hard, and I also know there is a way through it, and it really is usually four or five steps more that you haven't taken. And it's done. It's done. And in my experience, leaders who move through these moments, they don't do it again because you get better at recognizing the monsters before they become.

Business destroying, gobbling up creatures. I'll talk to you next week. One more thing before you go. In a world of digital courses and online content, I like to work with my clients live because I know that when you have someone you can work with, ask questions of and meet with, you're so much more likely to get the success that you want.

So head on over to how to ceo live.com. To learn more about our very exciting, very exclusive program just for female entrepreneurs. We'll see you there.

 

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